Starbuck’s Soliloquy

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“Miss, what time is it?” I turned my head to see sitting at the next table an LSU ball cap fitted snugly on the top of a graying senior sipping his Starbucks. It was the day before Thanksgiving and the perfect place to hide while my family shopped in the mega-retailer, Target.

In all honestly, had this stranger not spoken to me, I would have sat there completely happy, selfishly immersed in my own cafe latte, fascinated by Nashvillians fixated on buying early for Christmas.

“I’m waiting for my wife and daughter to finish walking the stores. I have a bad hip so I’m waiting them out.” He chuckled, “I forgot my watch.”

I gave him the time.

“You from Nashville ?” he said.

“No. Visiting my son here. New Jersey.” I honestly was not in the mood to chat with the LSU ball cap.

“How about that Sandy? Did you get hit? he asked.

“No. Our house is on a 266 foot cliff above the water. Luckier than most.” I returned to my latte hoping he would get the message.

“In Louisiana we get hurricanes and tornados. My mother used to call us in and get us all dressed up when one was comin’. After, we kids would just sit there in the house and wait. Wait until she told us it was over. ”

“Didn’t you have a root cellar, or anything?” I asked, my interest in him beginning to peak visualizing such an absurd scene.

“Nope. My mother went through the hurricanes in 1916 and she lost folks. We knew in case the tornado came, in case we died, we would look nice.”

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I was hooked. “Really? I mean, weren’t you afraid if you thought that? Or if you thought she thought that?”

“Oh, I can’t say, maybe, but I was young and lived on a farm in Louisiana. Things around me were dying all the time, so just was our way…. accepting…until I got older and went to Korea,” his voice trailing off as he swizzled his coffee.

“Korea? My late husband served in that war, though he was stationed in Germany. Easier duty. He drove for the generals, I think.”

“Yeah. Well I was in the heart of it. For me, there were really two wars going on. The Civil War and Korean one. I was only three months married when I was drafted and I was the only south boy in my barracks. I brought two things with me-a picture of my wife and a small confederate flag. Two things that were important to a Louisiana country boy. ( He chuckled a bit.) Well, that flag gave me a hell of a time the minute them northern boys knew I had it. I heard the talkin’, the whisperin’ at night how they were going to get it and beat me at the same time. The Civil War was still alive. They pushed me around. I had a few fights, but they never got my flag and it went all the way with me to Korea. I carried it in my jacket pocket all through the war. You know though, when we were fighting and things got bad….we were all brothers and the Civil War ended over there. It took bad things, stuff we never talked about, to bring us all together.” His voice trailed off and he adjusted the LSU cap just at the moment my son and husband came within view around the corner.

I said my goodbyes, gave him my card and walked out of Starbucks feeling I had just put a new marble into my bag. A chance meeting with a nice man with his own interesting story to tell.

I was a young girl when the Korean War was going on. I only lived it at a distance through radio and television reports, but it had little impact on my life since none of my family were called into the draft. It is a shame how disconnected we can become when conflict is not in our own front yard. If we couldn’t see it, we didn’t have to feel it. To me, it was just something that was.

This encounter, this chance meeting in Starbucks, for me, fortifies my belief that life is chocked full of serendipitous moments. What I call a grasshopper moment appears. It quickly hops into your life and then just as fast hops away unless you are smart or fast enough to catch them. In this instance, I was initially guilty of judging a book by it’s cover- but “good ole’ boy” LSU ball cap turned out to be one heck of an interesting guy. I am so glad I caught that grasshopper moment.

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Sandra Hart, former Romper Room teacher and talk show host is an actress and author who blogs about life over fifty.

Christmas of ’47

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As a child, the longest nights in my life were the nights before Christmas. I would lie there in the dark for what seemed like hours listening for the reindeer hooves on our roof, or the faintest sounds of bells tinkling from Santa’s sleigh. I believed. I believed that Santa would come and eat our homemade oatmeal cookies and drink milk from the glass bottles in the icebox and sit a spell to rest near our tree. I couldn’t sleep because I could miss it all. All of it.

It was 1947. The war had ended a few years back and we had moved in with my grandparents to get a new start. New job for Daddy. No more food ration stamps for Mother. Santa’s big bag of wishes for my brother and I. This would be the best Christmas ever! Golly. There were enough chimney’s for Santa at Grandpa’s. The old Victorian had one in every room and I had especially reminded Grandpa before I went to bed to keep the one in Grandma’s parlor open for him. Right near the tree.

Lying there with visions of everything on my long Santa list scrolling through my head, suddenly I heard it. I heard a clamor outside, noise and rushing about. He is here! He is here! Santa’s here! I was so excited that I rushed toward my brother’s bed and started shaking him. “He’s here. Santa’s here.” But Sherman must have been dreaming his own list of wonderful bows and arrows and such that he refused to surface back to the real world. I couldn’t stir him.

I was too afraid to peak out the window for fear that he wouldn’t leave anything but coal in my stocking if he caught me spying. So, eventually, that wonderful, long night in my seventh year of believing, what I didn’t know would be my last year of believing, I finally fell asleep knowing that Santa had come with toys and things for all of us.

My grandmother died that Christmas Eve. The scampering I heard was my mother and grandfather leaving the house to take her to the hospital. The toys under the tree I recognized as cast-offs from my older cousins. And the night case hidden under the buffet in Grandmas’ parlor was her suitcase brought home from the hospital. My seven-year-old heart was torn with grief about my grandmother that I loved dearly and the realization that Santa had not come after all.

I can’t say I learned anything about this experience, or that it changed me in anyway. I do know whatever heartache or disappointment I had, I kept to myself. Some wise moral to this event in my young life? Maybe I did grow up a bit over night. I really don’t know. I can only say it was a Christmas that I will never forget.

STORYTELLING

(Atlantic Highlands Elementary School is on our main street here in town and each time I pass I think of the wonderful foundation this little school with less that 300 students gave my children  when beginning their lives and still continues to do so with the children here in our Atlantic Highlands Borough. After attending a concert this weekend in New York where my son, Emerson, and the boys of Grammy nominated Tonic performed, I am remembered of the days when I waited in line to pick up my children and hearing of their adventures big and small within the rooms of The Atlantic Highlands Elementary School. I am moved to repost this blog written almost a ;year ago)

This Sunday morning on the CBS morning show, they had an interesting segment on storytelling and the resurgence of live storytelling with not only the baby boomers, but also the younger generation. More are are putting aside Facebook and other social networks to listen and create in real time.

Interesting how the universe kind of puts things in order in front of you when perhaps those things have been recently on your mind. Last week, at my son’s wedding I had been thinking about his life, the lives of my two daughters and the paths that they have walked. Whether it has been a curse or a blessing, my three children and I are creative beings, destined to create or dry up and blow away.

Sometimes, unless you get lucky, one’s creative life moves to the back shelf as an avocation instead of a vocation. Of the three of my gifted children, only my son has been lucky enough to use his creativity as his vocation.

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All of this takes me back to when he was in kindergarten. During my first conference with his teacher, I was stunned by her blunt revelation. My son was telling tall tales in school. Creating stories that were,to her, obviously untrue. I could feel the crimson creeping up my neck toward my face as I sat with my knees almost touching my chin in the kindergarten chair. It wasn’t until she continued that I became both intrigued and relieved.

“I decided that since Lee has such a creative imagination, I have given him the task of being the class storyteller. Each week I have set aside time for storytelling. He has never failed to entertain us,” she said with a smile.

Thirty-eight years have passed since that conference night. I now, so wish I could remember her name, because that was a great teacher. Instead of making my little son feel ashamed, she turned his childhood creativity and imagination into something special. And I can honestly say she was possibly responsible for the beginning of his confidence in his creativity and love of words to express his thoughts and feelings.

That young kindergartener has since grown up to be a twice Grammy nominated, Billboard Awarded, ASCAP honored singer/songwriter. A multi-platinum recording artist, movie and television theme songwriter and has been featured on over 40 recorded albums other than his own.

His genetic childhood love of storytelling grew into truths from his heart that have been embraced by millions of music fans.

This was the story I was thinking about sharing during the toast at his wedding last week, but I thought better of it. This was his bride’s day and her family’s. So I sat quietly with my heart filled with joy for all of them with my silent thoughts within my mother’s heart about that little kindergartener of mine with his entertaining imagination.

(Editors note: My oldest got into New York University through her creative writing. Brett has the special ability to write with a humorist edge and has also designed all of my book covers. Alison has written for equine magazines and is a wonderful writer and photographer.. Both are using their creative talents as avocations.)

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EIGHT DAYS OF DARKNESS

The sound was deafening. We wore earplugs at night to keep the speeding freight train from our worst nightmares. Forty-eight hours and then silence. Then darkness. The world we knew was limited to only what we could see from our eagles nest on the New Jersey Shore. We were cut off from the world. No internet. No cell. No electricity. No heat. For eight days we lived in darkness, lived in ignorance, not knowing how the rest of the world was fairing from Sandy’s wrath. So close, yet so far.

I awoke on Tuesday after Sandy, lying there in bed, thankful the roof was still on, windows intact, we were still alive and I was longing for a hot cup of coffee, musing at how bizarre my thought process is and just how addicted I had become throughout the years to that first jolt of caffeine, even in a crisis.

Sofi and I (still in my fuzzy slippers and bathrobe) cautiously stepped out the door so she could do her business, contemplating if I should travel further to see if my car was still there, but the heavens opened up before me. My next door neighbor was coming up the path with a thermos of hot coffee in his hand. If God himself had been there I couldn’t have been happier. He had a generator,heat and best of all HOT coffee.

It took me a full day to get the courage to walk further down the path to the car port. It was gone. My car was okay. Some of the house roof overhang was stripped of its top layer and a few roof shingles lay scattered about. A big old tree was down on my slope. Luckily it fell away from the house. A branch went through the cottage roof, making a repairable hole, but that was all. In the forty hears of hurricanes I have had worse. Andrew tore away my roof, in another my dining room collapsed, so I was grateful for the miracle of surviving Sandy’s 90 mile an hour plus winds.

In spite of everything have learned a lot from Sandy. How to make coffee and heat things in a coffee cup on top of a round dish of tea candles, held above the flames by a french fry cutter. (Don’t ask). All of this MacGyver stuff until we could get wood into the house for the fireplace and built-in stove.

The best is that I have rediscovered the joy of both conversation and silence. Withdrawing from the internet, texting and cell phone. Experiencing real time with my grandson and neighbors. Remembering the importance of human connection and the basics of giving and sharing. Forgetting the stress of the election, world chaos and all the negativity it had been evoking on my psyche.

This Sunday morning at 2:30 a.m., eight days into darkness, the furnace started running. I took off my cozy red hat and big sleep mask that were keeping my head and face warm in the cold and gave my hot water bottle, Sofi, a big hug. Life is good. The trees around me almost bent to the ground, but they are still here. So am I.

I now know the entire East Coast has been hit hard by Sandy, especially New Jersey, and many have lost their homes and lives. I pray for them all. The boardwalks and houses in the low shore lands are gone. But we New Jersey folks are used to surviving nature’s wrath. We will rebuild. We will survive.

The sound of helicopters is constant as they survey and photograph our misery, but there is always a silver lining in the midst of darkness. We just have to keep remembering that again it will be It will be.

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Election Insanity

My parents always fostered my interest in democracy, issues of the day that would affect our lives and of course the electoral process and it’s importance. Conversations about relevant topics around the dinner table are some of my most fond memories of my family and quality time we spent together.

So I can honestly say, I never though I ever would live to see the insanity that is going on within this Presidential Election bid and the hysteria, outrage and time consumed over trying to find subliminal meanings of common words.

At a time when we should be focused on serious issues facing this country. At a time when we have families on food stamps, unemployment at record highs, the economy tanking, the Arab countries challenging our strengths, our representatives being murdered overseas, and soldiers slain by those whom they mentor, some foolishly are waging a war over words and trying to find subversive meaning over legitimate words.

BINDER: A cover for holding loose sheets of paper, magazines, etc., together.
a substance that acts cohesively.

Every student, secretary, employer, head-hunter, songwriter, doctor, casting agent, author, recipe collector, anyone who has any kind of business or keeps things in order uses files or binders. I use binders for all my research in categories. I am doing a book on women and relationships and I keep those individual interviews in a BINDER! I am a woman and no one can accuse me of being bias against women because I keep a binder with their collective data. I have faith enough in the common sense of my gender to know that anyone who uses binders to organize data is not biased against the data contained within and that the media and politicians should focus on the real issues plaguing our country.

Let us all try to rise to a higher level, focus on the bigger picture to get this country back to honesty and morality in government, economic stability and unemployment down. Let us work together on both sides to restore America.

PLACES WITHIN MY HEART

MY JOURNEY ALONG THE RIVER OF LIFE

“I’ve known rivers. I’ve known rivers ancient as the world and older than the flow of human blood in human veins. My soul has grown deep like the rivers.” Langston Hughes

The River of Life

Clickety-click. Clickety-click. The sounds of the train’s wheels came steady and even, a metronome marking the beats of a song. To and fro, to and fro, to and fro. The inertia of the movement gently rocked our bodies to its rhythm. Our compartment with its worn cloth seats was the first comfortable place we had been since we left Israel and I stretched my legs to capture the cool air flowing beneath my calves. We had started early the day before motoring from Tel Aviv through Taba, crossed the Sinai to the Gulf of Suez and headed north to the canal where we crossed and continued west into Cairo. There we boarded the train for our long journey down the Nile.
Yesterday’s travel had been through miles of echoing desert silence. Harsh and rocky surfaces bleached dry by thousands of years of baking sun flanked either side of the road that sliced through the desert’s breast. Little evidence of life was visible except for an occasional Bedouin tent encampment far beyond the road’s edge. Now, as we headed west it was as though we had entered another world. Here near the river’s edge and beyond as far as the eye could see the land became green and life began again.
Outside my sand-spattered train window the landscape and the life on it mirrored a time long past. Low palm-roofed houses, abandoned tractors rusting in the fields next to donkeys hitched with primitive plows. Modern technology abandoned for more familiar methods of working the fertile soil along the river.
Groups of women scrubbed the family wash on large rocks while naked babies slept nearby in baskets and children skipped stones that skimmed creating small uneven hiccups on the surface of their murky playground. Mile upon mile, I watched them launder, bathe, play and drink from its waters- this river of life. The Nile.
It’s like looking through The National Geographic, I thought, remembering when my brother and I as children would spend hours poring over its colorful pictures. In our imaginations with each turn of the page we traveled to strange exotic places we had never before seen. Only now, I was here and the reality of what I was witnessing was almost overwhelming, enveloped safely in my coach behind my window, trespassing, unnoticed, into the lives of a culture, familiar, yet so foreign to me.
My husband and I had spent great time preparing for this trip. Gathering brochures, scouring travelogues for information that would make our vacation run smoothly. Initially, we had just planned on visiting his relatives in Israel, spending the bulk of our time traveling and covering as much of the historical sights, but the more we researched, the more convinced we were to include Egypt on our itinerary.
Arthur had never been to Israel before and was looking forward to seeing his relatives and praying at the Wailing Wall in Jerusalem. I was realizing a life-long dream of visiting the sights where Jesus was supposed to have performed miracles. Our diverse religions and heritages, Judaic and Christian, would come together again as it had in our marriage. And now, here we were in Egypt, the second leg of our journey, traveling along the Nile by train.
I looked over at my husband sleeping soundly with his head facing away from the window’s light, his jaw slack and moving ever so slightly in cadence with his breathing. My son had gone to the club car to get our itinerary from the tour guide, his backpack was open and thrown carelessly across his empty seat. Just like a boy, I thought.
I suppose his father’s disappearance when he was still so young has made it twice as hard for me to realize that he is growing up, hard for me to let go. I’m so used to doing it all alone most of the time. Habit really is my worst competitor. Sometimes I feel like an octopus with tentacles stretched everywhere. Arthur was never married before and never had any children, but he has done well, considering. I’m still learning, even at this point.
“What?” Arthur said half asleep.
“Nothing Dear, I was talking to myself again. Go back to sleep.”
“What time is it?”
“Early,” I replied.
He closed his eyes, adjusted his sleeping position and his jaw ever so slightly dropped again. He was asleep.
I watched him and marveled at how he could sleep so easily. I was never able to sleep on anything moving. I don’t know why, but ever since I was a child it was so.
My, how being here brings back memories of my childhood. I hadn’t been on a train in years. I remember during the war we lived in Washington, D.C. and traveled by train to my grandparents’ home in Ohio. My father would always book a drawing room which consisted of several bunk beds and a lavatory. I would play games on the floor in the center of the room. When bedtime came, my father must have read me hours of stories trying to get me to sleep on those overnight trips westward through the Allegheny Mountains. Daddy would hold me on his lap and sing to me. I remember resting my head on his shirt and hearing the deep resonance of his voice through his chest. It was that soothing resonance that finally brought the Sandman.
I looked at my watch. Seven-thirty. I could let Arthur sleep a little longer, at least until Lee returns. I studied his handsome face, peaceful and relaxed. His fair skin had been tanned by the hot Israeli sun and accentuated the whiteness of his fine wavy hair. He really must have been so handsome when he was young, I thought with those blue eyes.
I turned toward the window and the passing landscape along the Nile wondering what powerful secrets and stories its waters held. God knows I was no stranger to secrets…..

♥♥♥♥♥
Sandra Hart©2006/2012
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New Jersey Myth Buster

Henry Hudson fresh springs where in 1609 entered in his diary that he and his crew drank from the water on his way up toward what is now Manhattan.

I always knew how beautiful Princeton was from my college years, but beyond that, when I thought of New Jersey, I pictured industry, smoke stacks and just plain urban industrial blight. So years ago it was with great reluctance that I gave up my career to follow my husband to New Jersey.

Well, that was forty years ago, and you will have to drag me kicking and screaming away from this Garden State. We have beautiful beaches, extensive rich farm land, horse farms, mountains for skiing and thousands of acres of trails for hiking and horseback riding. In other words, it is a hidden paradise just a few miles away from the Big Apple and all of the culture that it affords.

We live in a town that overlooks where the Atlantic Ocean and Raritan Bay meet at Sandy Hook and its hills mark the highest point on the eastern seaboard of the U.S. south of Maine.

For thousands of years, the original inhabitants were the Lenape, who lived in and along the cliffs and creeks of Atlantic Highlands. Henry Hudson and his crew drank from our springs and the Lenape traded with the Europeans and sold a group of English settlers an area that covered the entire peninsula, making them the first European residents of our present day borough. From that our borough grew into a 1.2 square mile paradise of church tent camps and eventually picturesque Victorian homes nestled among the rolling bucolic hills.

Today, from its hills and bayside, the Manhattan skyline can been seen. Out from its harbor, which is the largest on the East Coast, sail pleasure, fishing and commuter boats.

So, let those Jersey Shore kids who are not from New Jersey at all, try to give us a black eye in the land of reality television. We who live here in paradise know better.